Alternative options for your wedding day!
Are you looking for wedding inspiration that’s a little bit different and non-traditional? If the answer’s yes then this is the place to find it. I have gone through 12 years of wedding photos and complied all things alternative, quirky and daring just for you. And as always with my wedding planning blogs I promise to update this collection of alternative wedding ideas, so this blog will continue to grow and become even more fabulous as the years go on! Now settle in and prepare to be inspired…
Alternatives to flower bouquets.
When deciding what to have for your bouquet, the questions you’ll be asking yourself are probably “which flowers do I want, what colours will it be and should I have real or artificial flowers”. But who says your bouquet has to be floral at all? Bernadette made her bouquet out of silver brooches that she had been collecting from charity shops for many years. The bride loving named this jewellery bouquet Vlad! It was sparkly and eye catching but beware if you’re thinking of making one yourself as it was also incredibly heavy! Another alternative idea to a floral bouquet is Rosie’s butterfly bouquet. I think these were made from plastic garden ornaments, the kind that come with stakes and the stakes are essentially the stem that you’d have with a flower. I’ve also included a photo of a bouquet that had succulents in it - I know there are flowers in this example too but you could have a bouquet made up of just succulents or other plants such as ferns for example.
I’m sure there are many other alternatives to flower bouquets though, I’ve just given it a quick google and some suggestions I found there are: lanterns, wands (perfect for a Harry Potter fan), lollipops, dreamcatchers, balloons, a handbag, feathers, books, parasols, paper origami or candles.
Try the Eldredge Knot.
There are 14 stages to the Eldredge knot but it’s actually ‘knot’ that difficult to do - I’m rather proud of that pun! I’ve done this knot for many Grooms and others in the wedding party, I actually taught it to the person who’s doing it in this photo. It’s been a while though, so I couldn’t do it from memory anymore - I’d definitely have to get my phone out to remind myself of how it’s done. It’s a great alternative to the standard tie knot, it’s subtle but it gets a lot of compliments when people notice it.
Have a ring warming ritual before your ceremony.
A Ring Warming Ceremony is an Irish custom, where the wedding rings are passed around to your guests before the ceremony. The guests will hold the rings in their hands and warm them with hopes and wishes for the couple marrying. I feel like this could easily be included in a civil ceremony, just make sure your guests are seated for the ceremony five minutes earlier and ask someone you trust to pass the rings around. It really shouldn’t take long and it shouldn’t disturb the registrar at all as it would be done before the ceremony even starts.
Jump on a boat for your reception?
Laura and Daniel had an intimate wedding with just 16 people in total. They married at their local registry office and then had their wedding breakfast in a very fancy restaurant, which had a private function room. After the meal, we all boarded on a boat for a tour around the Plymouth Sound. The happy couple had their cake cut and first dance on the boat and it was an awesome alternative to the usual wedding reception.
Have an afternoon tea instead of a big meal.
An afternoon tea is aesthetic food - a meal worth photographing. They always look so beautiful and classy, perfect if you’re going for a sophisticated but casual vibe at your wedding. With a variety on display, there’s something for everyone and don’t be fooled by the small portions - afternoon tea’s can be very filling!
Or… hire a food van in place of a sit down meal.
Food vans are another casual meal alternative that you could consider. A very different vibe to the sophisticated afternoon tea - food van’s are edgy and a bit more daring. Hiring a food van in place of a sit down three course meal really challenges what people have come to expect from a wedding, but it always goes down so well with guests and people love seeing something different. If you and your partner are festival lovers or if street food is your thing, this could be a great way of injecting your personality into your wedding day.
Have a Flower Ceremony.
A flower ceremony is a romantic and visual addition to a wedding, which symbolises love and the joining together of families. This is a ritual that your immediate family and friends will join in with. How it works is like this… you ask your chosen guests to come up and choose a flower. I think it’s nice to have a variety of flowers available for them to choose from and I love the idea that Michelle and Tim had, which was to label each flower with what it represents/symbolises. Then you’ll need to have an empty, larger vase for your guests to place their chosen flower into. Eventually you end up with a flower display that your nearest and dearest have all contributed towards. It is a lovely way of honouring the special bond that you have with your friends and family and recognising the part they play in your relationship. This can particularly be suited to blended families as it’s a reminder of the joy that each individual brings to the couple’s lives and how beautiful it is to all be together. Of course if you want to keep the flower arrangement, you will need to have them preserved but you could perhaps use artificial flowers instead. Flower ceremonies are not currently something that you can have included in your legal civil ceremony but I don’t see why you can’t include this later on in the day. Perhaps it can be part of the speeches or happen in-between one of your food courses? All you need is a confident guest (or yourself) to speak to the room and explain how it works and why it’s being done.
Don’t be afraid to add some colour to your wedding dress…
Colour is a form of self expression, it communicates how we’re feeling but also says something about our personality and style. Wedding dresses are all very different but traditionally they’re often all the same colour - white or a variation of white. So why not have something a little different going on with your dress? You can go all the way like Bea did with her blue evening dress or perhaps just add a splash of colour like Victoria did (Victoria wore separates, so there was only blue on her skirt). Marigold had colourful embroidery on her dress but also had a rainbow ribbon lacing up the back of her dress AND a rainbow underskirt too! I know this sounds like a lot of colour but as you can see it still looked very subtle and bridal. Sianika actually made her whole wedding dress herself!! Amazing isn’t it!! She added little colour (but a lot of wow factor) to her dress with beautiful floral embroidery. If you’d like to go even more subtle with colour perhaps you should look for a dress like Abigail’s, which had a very slight pink tinge to it. This was more obvious when the dress was hanging up in the morning and the light was shining through it. When the dress was on it wasn’t as noticeable but there was just enough colour to catch your eye.
Alternative wedding shoes!
I’m a big believer in comfort and practicality over tradition and pain. I never understand it when people put themselves through so much discomfort with their shoe wear. Most Brides only last a couple of hours before telling me they can’t wait to get their heels off, then they change into something more comfortable and no-one is the wiser. So why not start off with the comfy shoes and have a painless wedding day? If you’re having a full length wedding dress your shoes won’t be seen at all - I have thousands of photos to prove this. So with that in mind, do your shoes really need to be white? I don’t think so. They could be anything you want them to be! And if you’re worried about them not being wedding-y or bridal enough then get them personalised with the date of your wedding and your new surname. Or perhaps just add a little of your colour scheme to your footwear in some way.
And if your dress doesn’t sit fully on the floor and your toes do poke out like Michelle’s, Sasha’s and Marigold’s (all pictured above) then so what? Is it really that bad if people see your non-traditional footwear? I don’t think so.
Don’t feel like you have to tone down your alt look for your wedding, be you and own it!
Please don’t feel like you need to tone down who you are in order to be a bride or groom. If anything this is a great opportunity to dial it up!
You could have a handfasting ceremony?
Handfasting is of ancient Celtic origin but is also associated with Paganism. It is a symbolic act that takes place during a wedding ceremony, where the hands of the happy couple are bound together with ribbon or cord to represent their commitment to each other. Registrars do not currently offer this as part of a legally binding ceremony because civil ceremonies are required by law to have no religious content at all. So if you’re having a handfasting ceremony you’ll probably still have to do the legal bit on another day. Although I do wonder if there’s a way of still incorporating this into a legal wedding day? Perhaps you could ask your registrar to do their legal part, then you sign the documents and instead of the registrar sending you off back down the aisle as a married couple you could arrange for them to leave a little earlier. The legal documents would be signed, you can thank your registrar and then when they’ve left a loved one could come up and finish off the ceremony. The loved one could preform a handfasting ceremony and say a few personal things about you before sending you off down the aisle as a legally married couple. I’m not sure if registrars would appreciate my idea, but what you do after they’ve left shouldn’t really concern them, one would assume? You don’t have to be of Celtic origin or be a Pagan in order to appreciate the symbolism of this ritual, in the same way that you don’t have to be Irish to have a ring warming ceremony.
Get creative with your ceremony exit.
Going through all my previous weddings has made me realise that I’ve worked with a lot of farmer couples. And farmer couple Krissie & Jason had an ‘Arch of Hayforks’ church exit which was an awesome alternative to the traditional Arch of Sabers or Arch of Swords, that often happens at military weddings. And it got me thinking, you could customise this idea with so many other things - hockey sticks, tennis rackets, garden hoes - anything that has a bit of length and isn’t too heavy. Doing this would be a little nod to something important in your life, whether that be a hobby or a career.
Release butterflies or doves…
Okay so these butterflies didn’t fly out as planned - they didn’t want to leave the box because it was quite cold outside (which was unfortunate as it was August). But imagine how cool it would have been if they had flown out.
This butterfly release was actually part of a ceremony (led by a celebrant) and this was the reasoning behind it...
’According to an American Native Indian Legend: If anyone desires a wish to come true they must first capture a butterfly and whisper that wish to it. Since a butterfly can make no sound, the butterfly cannot reveal the wish to anyone but the Great Spirit who hears and sees all. In gratitude for giving the beautiful butterfly its freedom, the Great Spirit always grants the wish.
So, according to legend, by making a wish and giving the butterfly its freedom, the wish will be taken to the heavens and be granted’.
You might also consider releasing Doves because they symbolise peace, love and a new beginning. Doves are so symbolic for a wedding because they pair for life and both share in the caring of their young.
Alternatives to a guest book.
I’m noticing more and more that wedding guest books are just not being written in anymore. Perhaps this is because people find it daunting to have a whole blank page in front of them and they can’t think of something different to say to what they’ve already written in the card they’ve given you. You could argue that a guest book is unnecessary as you could make a wedding guest book out of your greetings cards after the wedding. But I think people do like to sign something at weddings and giving them something small to write on like a wooden heart for a jar or frame is often all you need. I think the wooden puzzle (made by Stag Design) is a great alternative though because you can frame it afterwards and you’ll be able to read everyone’s messages really easily. I do really love seeing people get creative, so Kim & Huw’s vinyl alternative always stands out in my mind as one of the best guest books I’ve seen at a wedding. Kim made these herself and you can get in touch with her about getting some made for your wedding on her facebook page Kimmie Design.
Krissie and Jason are farmers and so they had a sheep inspired guest book. They had painted a simple scene of some rolling hills on a canvas, they then had some white finger paint for their guests to leave a finger print sheep on their canvas. Guests could then sign their name below their fingerprint with a pen and I believe there were wet wipes available for people to remove any paint left on their fingers. The guests had all contributed to a work of art, which the couple could then have on their wall at home. I’ve also seen the same fingerprint idea done but with a bare tree and the fingerprints become the leaves of the tree.
Bernadette and Paul had a key tree for their wedding guest book. Each key came with a little card to fill out, asking their guests what they think the key to a happy marriage is. These led fairy light trees can be bought from various home stores and they can be displayed all year-round in your living room at home.
Lastly, guests often really struggle to think of what to write in a guest book. So these advice cards are a nice alternative and they give people a little bit of guidance/inspiration on what to write.
Hire a celebrant (or ask someone special) who will give you a unique and personalised ceremony.
Having your ceremony officiated by a celebrant or a loved one would not be a legal wedding ceremony, so you will still have to pop to the registry office to get the legal bit done another time. But the non-legal ceremonies are always the ones that get the most laughter and they’re always so laid back too! This is because the ceremony will be tailored to you and the relationship you both have. The celebrant will tell stories about you, how you met and what binds you together as a couple. These ceremonies are so personal and meaningful and the guests always enjoy them too!
Light a Unity Candle during your ceremony.
A unity candle is lit during a wedding ceremony to symbolise the union of two people. This is a modern non-religious ritual where the couple each take a lighted candle and use those flames to light a larger unity candle. This signifies 'two becoming one'. Again, this is not currently something your registrar will offer you as part of your legal civil ceremony, but perhaps you can find a creative way to incorporate this in your day some way? You could maybe have the candles at the end of the aisle and you light the unity candle on your way out of the ceremony? This idea would be easier to arrange in a venue rather than a registry office. Or it could be something you put on your top table and you light it just before your speeches or meal?
Book a photographer who also offers vintage film photography.
Film photography is trending! So naturally there has been a huge rise in photographers offering this as part of their wedding coverage. But… I’ve been offering my Go Vintage film photography since 2018 - so I guess that makes me a bit of a trendsetter eh? Seriously though these old school prints are the perfect keepsake for any vintage lover (or trend follower).
Why not have a savoury cake?
Do you prefer sweet or savoury? If the answer is the latter then why not have cheese in place of a cake? If you’ve read my Ultimate Guide to Wedding Planning blog then you’ll know I am a big advocate for people planning the wedding that they want, not what they think their guests may want. Weddings are expensive and I don’t think anyone wants to spend money on things they don’t really like, but they feel like they have to buy it just because that’s what people expect to see at a wedding. Sod that! Break the rules!! Also, cakes of cheese look amazing!
Or perhaps have individuals instead of a large cake?
Having something pre-cut like a brownie or ready to eat like a cupcake can be a really practical decision. Not all venues will take your cake into the kitchen and portion it up for you - if you’ve booked a really DIY venue like a village hall for example, you may have to cut up the cake yourself or ask one of your guests to do it for you. I love this idea with the brownies because the couple still had a small cake up the top to do the traditional cake cut with.
Unique ways to present your seating plan.
Seating plans can sometimes be difficult to do differently. I think the most common seating plan I see at weddings is where the names are all written on a mirror. This is a relatively cheap and quick way of doing it and I assume you could clean the mirror afterwards and use it in your home, which is great as nothing is really being wasted that way. But if it’s not on a mirror, it’s usually a list of names printed and displayed on some sort of board, easel or picture frame. Now there’s nothing wrong with these ideas at all, they look fantastic and they get the job done. But if you are looking to do something a bit different then maybe these ideas will spark up some creativity in you…
Firstly there’s Lauren and Matthew’s flowerpot table plan. The flowerpots were attached to a wooden pallet and then that was propped up on an easel. Then there was a little label attached to each plant pot with twine saying who’s on that table. It was so adorable and it got a lot of compliments. It’s always great to have opportunities to showcase your colour scheme and the flowers in the plant pots really helped to reinforce the colour scheme that Lauren and Matthew had chosen. The only downside really was that the barn they had their reception in was open to the elements a bit and so the little labels did blow around a bit. If you’re going to use this idea I’d definitely recommend doing it in a completely indoor venue.
Next you’ll see Becky & Richard’s table plan on a tyre! Another fantastic, creative idea from a farmer couple. And you can’t deny - they really did make that tyre look pretty! Lastly, I have shown a photo of Natasha and Tony’s table plan because I love the fact that they didn’t use names at all. Guests found which table they were at by spotting their photo instead. I think this is a really cute table plan idea and it’s also a great way to celebrate your guests.
Have a flower man!
Break tradition and liven up your wedding ceremony by having a flower man instead of a flower girl. I’ve seen some great videos online of flower men, dancing their way down the aisle, giving it all they’ve got and I’m here for it! While we’re at it, let’s normalise Best Women/Groom’s women and Men of honour/Bride’s men too. Gender shouldn’t have to come into who you have by your side in your wedding party.
Say no to the slow and romantic first dance.
Here’s a friendly reminder that first dances don’t have to be a certain way. They don’t need to be formal, they don’t need to be mainstream or slow-paced. If you’re a raver, rave! Shaunna & Cody’s first dance song was called ‘Right by Your Side’ by N-Force v Darren Styles. It starts off a bit traditional but then it soon kicks into a full blown rave! They told me that they did consider lots of slow and romantic love songs for their first dance but none of those felt like ‘them’. Then the penny dropped and they realised they don’t need to conform to that norm, they can make this their own.
I’ve also seen moshing at a wedding before - it was actually the first wedding I ever photographed. The couple hired a Metallica tribute band and they moshed the night away. Not sure if Grandma appreciated the band playing ‘So What?’ which has the controversial C-word in it, but I think the wedding music was everything the guests expected from the heavy metal loving couple.
Have your ceremony and your after party on separate days.
There are so many reasons why you might want to consider splitting your wedding up across two separate days. Perhaps you want your wedding to happen across two locations? Maybe the thought of having the wedding all on one day is overwhelming you? Maybe it works out better for you cost wise? Whatever your reasons may be, it’s important that you do what is best for you.
Above are some examples from Aimee & James’ wedding days. They booked three hours of coverage with me for their ceremony and then three hours for their reception at a later date. Take a look at their beautiful wedding days in more detail here.
How about this, instead of the usual wedding favours?
Your wedding favours don’t need to be traditional and they don’t need to be something that sits waiting for your guests on the table. Michelle and Dave are really into music festivals so they had these awesome festival style wrist bands made up for their wedding, accompanied by a lanyard program (which replaced the need for a traditional ‘order of the day' flyer or sign). These were handed out to guests as they arrived at the wedding and guests wore them for the whole day. Just think - those traditional wedding favours of chocolates or sweets will be gone before the day is done. Whereas these wedding favours will be kept and treasured.
Alternatives to confetti…
If you’re looking to change things up a bit, perhaps you could swap traditional confetti out for something different? Bubbles are often the common confetti alternative but I do sometimes find that they don’t always show up so well in photographs - you ideally need quite a dark background for the bubbles to really be visible so they’re really not ideal for every wedding. Another idea that I’ve seen is pompoms and these are great because they’ll show up against most backdrops and they’re also easy to tidy up afterwards. Win win. Then there’s ribbon wands, which I’ve seen at a couple of weddings and it’s really quite effective.
Get creative with your wedding transport.
Don’t get me wrong, a really nice wedding car can be awesome but this blog is about alternative wedding ideas, hence the examples above.
Have a themed wedding!
I couldn’t possibly write a blog about alternative weddings without mentioning Holly & Sasha’s Halloween themed wedding! They went all out and their guests got on board with it too; wearing Halloween costumes in place of formal attire. So much thought and creativity went into the spooky décor, it was amazing! If you’d like to see more from their ghostly gathering click here.
